014; breakdown

.....ALMOST

I'm a happy-go-lucky kind of person.
I don't get stressed easily.
I don't get mad easily.
I get really hyper when there is something that excites/angers me.
There are things that push my buttons - like using the the word gay as a synonym for shitty.
There are things that get to my heart easily - like unexpected compliments.
I'd say I'm a pretty simple person.

I was in the middle of calculating my marks for second semester and something just hit me. My marks were going down the hill and I was freaking out about it. I usually have good courses and bad courses to even it out, but apparently not this semester. I felt like I was on the verge of a breakdown - but maybe that's an excuse because I haven't had a good cry in long time. People have breakdowns in university, so I was expecting mine to be coming soon. My wonderful friend reminded my that university isn't something to cry about.  University isn't something to whine about either - it's a privilege. But still, I strive to get the highest marks I can. Why though. To satisfy myself? My parents? Is it cause I'm Asian and it's in my genes? Why do marks matter. Okay maybe it's a kind of important to stay in the program, but I feel like an overachiever. I envy the people who can spit out awesomeness without putting much effort and time into it.

Three more days of classes and a whole lot of school after that.
At least I have Go Radio and Scream 4 to look forward to in the upcoming weeks.

I hope you're doing better than I am.
Love,
Angel.

Jan 11; colony loving

 Day 6

Kushinagar: a mini profile (about the place I'm staying in)

• Location: Kushinagar, Uttar Pradesh
• Food: I saw a lot of sugar cane trucks and a sugar factory
• Things to do: tons of temples
• Known for: Buddha had his last meal here.

There's nothing to do here - or so they keep telling me. For me, there's everything to see and experience. The simplistic lifestyle of the locals amazes me. I'm living with my cousins right now. They live in the most sought after "colony" (or community) in Pedrauna (which is a small town in Kushinagar). Most sought after? I got to thinking: my first night was rough - freezing cold, hot water is not available until you turn on the geyser to heat it and that takes about 15 - 20 minutes, slept on a bed without a mattress, dark washroom... Um, it's really different from my regular lifestyle. When I went to town yesterday, I realized what I had was a mansion. 

People lived in one room shacks, no washroom, no door. Now that's rough. To see people living this kind of life and still be able to smile and play is absolutely heart warming.

Update: cold, dark showers don't scare me anymore.